The Week in Stupid (April 7-13)

Fox “News” is still gushing over the tariffs, characterizing them as “manly”, and even suggesting that they could reverse a “crisis in masculinity” — which apparently is a thing at Fox. Nothing like losing your shirt to get the old testosterone pumping, eh? Next thing you know, we’ll all be doing a Tucker Carlson. No, not telling the judge in your defamation suit that nobody should take you seriously; but tanning your balls like a real man.

Also at Fox, Jeanine Pirro was shocked and outraged to hear that Social Security benefits were being paid to children as young as one year old. It’s called Survivor Benefits, Jeanine. Try Google.

And at Fox, Jesse Watters reassures us about his network’s Obama hatred: “We didn’t want to kill Barack Obama, we just didn’t think he was legally qualified to be president because of where he was born.” Sorry, Jesse, but Hawaii has been a state longer than you’ve been alive.

Bobby Junior came through yet again, calling autism an “epidemic”, and pledging to find the causes and begin eradicating them. Within five months.

Secretary Of Education Linda McMahon — whose prime directive is to put herself out of a job by eliminating the agency she heads, thereby helping to keep the populace less educated and thus more likely to vote Republican — repeatedly referred to AI as “A one”. Only the best people.

Said official White House Proxy Liar Karoline Leavitt, “as a matter of policy, we do not respond to reporters with pronouns in their bios”, using two pronouns to declare that she hates pronouns.

ICE director Tom Homan finds Taco Bell’s menu repulsive to “real Americans”, noting that “I find it offensive Taco Bell has items in Mexican and not in English”. If he really has such distaste for the “Mexican” language, maybe he shouldn’t risk eating food from what Fox calls one of the “Mexican countries”. So what’s the English word for taco, Tom? And why are you speaking a language borrowed from a foreign country?

FCC Chair Brendan Carr has been spotted wearing a gold lapel pin in the shape of the head of Dear Leader –a pin available on Amazon, by the way. (Coincidentally, the guy depicted on the pin has been pressuring Carr to impose penalties on media outlets critical of him.) Rumors have been circulating that all White House drones — er, staffers are being “quietly ordered” to wear such a pin. So far, no confirmation. A White House spokesperson denied the rumor, responding, “If they choose to wear one, it is to show support for the greatest President in history.” Okay kiddies, repeat after me: It’s not a cult it’s not a cult it’s not a cult.

5 comments

  1. So much here. I can’t believe they’re still pushing the birther thing after all these years even though birthers have done worse in court than 2020 election deniers. I guess there’s always someone who hasn’t been paying attention, hears it for the first time and thinks there might be something to it.

  2. Whenever Democrats criticize Trump, the response is for Trump to spread even more outrageous claims about Democrats.

  3. Disagreeing with Conservative people, is not a threat to their free speech–unless they are afraid to allow me mine.

  4. Trumpers feel that “radical left liberals” are too insulting when it comes to revealing the truth behind their lies and manufactured misunderstandings. But yes, freedom of speech goes two ways. So do they believe that they have not also been critical of liberals?

    The whole thing is dependent on MAGA’s “unfair persecution” card, because the right wing’s persecution complex is a reliable way for them to convincingly misrepresent honest rebuttals from the left as being merely unfair attacks. No one wants to feel persecuted, so they claim that’s the primary intention of liberals. However, those on the left cannot even count the many ways that Trumpers have attacked them, including numerous insults from the business sector and intentional lies about what they endure from the right. If one side is doing what the other side says it is, then Poof! The illusion of being misrepresented by endless attacks is used to discredit anything that an honest campaign says and/or does.

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