This past week, there was widespread confusion among the MAGAs about chronology, and who was president when. Bill O’Reilly, bloviating about the supposed hypocrisy of Democrats in regard to the Epstein files on News Nation, proclaimed that Epstein was convicted and committed suicide during the Biden administration. The host, after an instant of covert Googling, corrected him, noting that these events occurred in 2019. After a moment of stunned silence, O’Reilly responded with “So?”

Rep. Mike Collins of Georgia (R-naturally) blamed the civil unrest in 2020 after racist police killings on President Biden. Who was not president at the time. Nor did he hold any other office.

The confusion, unsurprisingly, embraced even the Lord And Master himself. Speaking of his desire to fire Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell, he said, “I’m surprised that he was appointed, I’m surprised that Biden put him in.” Biden would be surprised to hear that too, Don, since Powell was appointed by the guy who was in the White House in 2017.

Speaking of the Mafia Don, he boasted about cutting an additional 267 million from the budget of the National Parks. And he has a scheme to make up the difference: charge more for foreign visitors. After all, he says, the National Parks — including the one he calls “Yo-Semites”– are about “America first”, to invoke his favorite white nationalist slogan. By the way, the additional fees charged for foreigners are expected to raise 90 million dollars. Hmmm… Any math teachers out there wanna have a crack at explaining something to him?

Never known to waste an opportunity to exploit a non-issue for political gain, Republicans are pushing ahead with an “investigation” into Biden’s use of an autopen like every other president. The investigation approval was signed by James Comer, who spent the past few years promising he was going to have grounds to impeach Biden any second now. Well, actually, he didn’t sign it. He used an autopen.

“(Charlie Kirk is) a really intellectually curious guy, so he loves to to pursue the truth as he can find it. “– Michael Knowles

“(Omar Fateh) was born in America, but he’s not actually an American. America is not his home… nobody can provide an example of a single way that the United States has benefited from Somali immigration.” — Matt Walsh

Pam Bondi proudly announced the administration’s termination of language support for non-native English speakers, which she characterizes as “wasteful virtue signaling” , noting that her regime will stress “assimilation over division”. Resistance is futile.

Greg Gutfeld of Fox “News” suggests that maybe he and his fellow Nazis should stop bristling over people calling them Nazis, and instead just embrace the word and make it their own, the way African-Americans did with their own N-word.

Shemane Nugent (wife of Ted) suggested that the flooding in Texas was somehow an “attack” on the White House Occupant, adding, “I believe it’s spiritual warfare. Now, Satan, you know, comes to steal, kill, and destroy. And how best to do that, Sid, but to come after God’s children, especially innocent young girls who just wanted to learn scriptures.”

Glenn Beck, astoundingly, is making his very first — and second –appearances here this week. (Maybe it’s taken so long because he just doesn’t appear much of anywhere these days.) Noting that he was once one of the most admired people in the country, he lamented that he’s now one of the most despised. And why? Well, because of a dishonest media, natch.

Beck also weighed in on the biggest story of the week, the (nonexistent) Epstein Files. He believes the Lord And Master decided not to release the (nonexistent) files because Democrats somehow planted phony evidence against him. He added, “President T—p built his political dynasty on attacking elite pedophiles”. Oh?? And will THAT list ever be released so the rest of us can be enlightened about this campaign he’s so modestly and carefully kept secret?

“I’m going to just have to defer to President T—p on this thing. He actually knows Jeffrey Epstein, or knew him. … I’m going to take his word for it… And the idea, everybody, that President T—p staked his reputation on this is false. ” –Greg Kelly, Newsmax. His…reputation???

After the Wall Street Journal published a damning letter that Don had written to Jeffrey, some MAGAts “defended” their Lord And Master, insisting the letter must be a forgery because it contained the word enigma, which they insist is a word that their Stable Genius of a leader… um, isn’t familiar with. Well, while there’s no disputing his ignorance and ineptitude, and he may or may not know what enigma means, the fact is that he’s used it before. There’s video.

And the Mafia Don himself promptly sued Rupert Murdoch and the Wall Street Journal for publishing the letter. (As you may have noticed, he has quite a racket going for suing media outlets that offer him inadequate worship, knowing they’ll settle rather than drag out a costly legal battle and incur penalties he now can exact.) Maybe he’s forgotten that Murdoch also owns… Fox “News”. Which is not only the personnel pool for his administration, but the propaganda engine that propelled him to political success. It’s hard to imagine a more extreme case of biting the hand that feeds you. Or a more devastating “civil war” within the MAGA Cult if this thing plays out to the bitter end.